Is Your Business Turning You Into a Cranky Wino?

Seriously my friend,

Is your business making you a wine lush?

Is your "boss" being a big ol' bitch?

I am writing this post on the eve of flying to Alaska for a quick trip to visit family

but this topic has been in the forefront of my mind.

We all know being an entrepreneur is hard. 

It's you, your product, and your vision on the line.

At times, you may feel exposed

like a raw open wound;

a wound that we sometimes treat with:

too much wine

 a few too many bags of popcorn

or by lashing out at our loved ones.

As a sane making (and keeping the peace) practice,

I've created a random list of what I'm doing for the next six months

to shut my hard ass of a "boss" up.

Also I wanted to let you know that the early bird discount for Sexy Money Moguls ends on Wednesday September 25th.

 If creating a money making business

the feminine way is what you desire 

time to hop on board 

apply here for more information about Sexy Money Moguls

Now on to that list......

• give myself permission to have even more wine or more popcorn if I want it (dammit:)
• tell my loved ones that I am creating some awesome great things that light my fire
• (Which means I might be out of communication for a while or short when we do talk.)
• Please don't hold it against me(if you do I know it won't be for long because you love me)
• Turn off my phone, email, Facebook, etc when I am feeling full so that I don't have an opportunity to be short with my loved ones.
• Schedule down time
• let it go (yes that)
• sleep
• sleep some more
• stay in bed all day
• have a nap
• drink orange juice with a grass fed steak
• get a massage
• get a foam roller
• take a yoga class
• learn a new pole trick
• belly dance
• ask for help
• hire some help
• surrender
• let it go
• release
• drink some water
• add some electrolytes (your adrenals are probably shot) 
• eat some celery for the wine bloat
• try dandelion tea
• meditate for 5 whole minutes
• sing your favorite song
• listen to a podcast
• get Spotify
• make friends with another entrepreneur
• play around on pinterest
• give myself gold stars for every completed business task
• call a good friend for a bitch, moan, gratitude, and desire fest
• pound a new series on Netflix
• start checking my email only once a day
• take email off my phone and tablet
• turn off all social media notifications
• hire a coach or mentor
• invest in yourself
• say yes
• say no
• orgasm
• om
• move
• make lists
• commit to only 2 tasks on my to-do list
• ask my tarot cards
• ask the astro twins
• pretend I am a psychic
• go for a walk with no destination in mind
• run
• get a guitar
• learn a song
• make a desire list
• compliment a stranger
• ask for something I really want
• be courageous
• be scared
• be
• chant
• find your song totem
• introduce yourself to a stranger
• invite a colleague to lunch
• send an unasked for recommendation someone's way
• tell someone they are awesome
• tell yourself you are awesome
• meditate for 20 minutes
• imagine yourself on Oprah's couch
• read a real book (not a kindle)
• Say "I love you" more 
• complain less
• turn your bank account into an game
• pay an outstanding bill while wearing lingerie
• write thank you on all checks
• try guessing what note a train stop makes
• find a task that REQUIRES markers and crayons
• send thank you cards
• pay it forward
• play it back in gratitude
• drink green juice
• eat a salad
• try cashew ice cream
• eat ice cream for dinner
• sign up for a 5k
• fire that client
• decide you are perfect
• realize perfection is an illusion 

 xoxo

p.s.
Creating a money making business is a learned skill just like any other. It's built moment by moment, piece by piece. Join Sexy Money Moguls to create the business of your dreams. 

This is why I'm hot: 5 women who take sexy to the next level!

I get asked quite a bit,

What the heck does sexy have to do with money?

The truth is 'sexy and money' are intricately tied. When your sexy is out of whack you feel:

Attacked on all fronts by the guilt monster, finding yourself wrong for all your actions.
The classic case of damned if you do.......  If you are working, you worry about neglecting your other relationships. You feel guilty about things like over-eating, not working out, and neglecting your children and family. When you aren't working you feel guilty because you aren't focused on your to-do list. You are one purchase away from a downward spiral of shame and self-abuse.

A paper thin veneer of self-worth and esteem, – Your boundaries are out of whack and everyone gets a piece of you which often results in seeing yourself as a self-sacrificing martyr, often putting others’ wants and demands before your own needs, all the while harboring silent resentment towards them and self-criticism towards yourself. You will tend to overspend on others and lack the ability to say no or to spend on yourself

Easily offended, hurt or upset by the words and actions of people that you perceive as not appreciating you.  You get defensive and tend to condemn others who behave differently than you think they should.

You are flawed and are always under construction.  You don’t trust that you can be loved just for being who you already are. Instead you believe that you have to continually improve yourself to become worthy of being loved, by others and by yourself. You buy and consume to fill a never ending hole and your bank account bears the brunt of this ongoing construction project.

What is Sexy Money?

Sexy Money is a philosophy that a woman in touch with her sensuality and turn-on is a powerful master of her domain INCLUDING her finances. 

When I feel unworthy, guilty, or less than spectacular

 the quickest way for me to feel better is for me to step into my sexy.

Today I want to introduce you to Sexy.

There is that old adage that no man is an island. Well I am here to tell you no woman is an oasis of sexiness all by herself.

 I've compiled a list of an amazing group of women who can take your sexy into the stratosphere. 

The Queen of Seduction Kitty Cavalier. Kitty is the maestra of the art of the tease. I've had the pleasure of taking her classes and left each time feeling sexy, sensual, and powerful. Normally Kitty's services are only available in the New York area but now the whole world can be seduced by her charm and cheek. Kitty is offering a 4 week online program called "Your Seductress Unveiled" check out the details here.

Body by Sacred Brooklyn. Enough said. I have never had more fun and felt more embodied and challenged than when I am taking class at Sacred. They have one of THE best pole dancing programs in NY. They are also launching their first ever Yoga Teacher Training program this fall. I will be a student of this session dubbed "The Courage Cycle". If you want a full bodied love affair with, well--YOUR body. Sacred is the place for you.

Lauren Harkness of Lauren Harkness Designs. This woman’s designs drip from my neck, wrists, fingers, and ears. Ok in all transparency she is one of my best friends. We've known each other since college. Even if she is my best friend I can’t deny the allure of all her jewelry. I save up for her stuff every year. Her jewelry is usually the only stuff I wear. I still remember the days she did purses and yoga mats (apparently she is designing a new line of leather purses for release in the next few years, I can’t wait!) Until then, find her gorgeous jewelry creations here on www.laurenharkness.com. My favorite, the sunset necklace.

My personal glam sqaud. The Ladies of Glamour Bitch Photography. Take a look at the photos around this site. They speak for themselves. Dawn and her team made me feel so comfortable during my photo shoot. Plus you get your hair and makeup done at her adorable studio.

How's that for feeling like a sexy superstar?

I've been OBSSESSED with these ladies since I moved to New York. I remember the first time I saw them at the Bowery Poetry Club. I was frozen, my attention rapt, I wanted to BE them, I was them. Finally brown girls (who weren't the parade of half-naked actresses and singers we are inundated with every day) telling their stories while being coy, authentic sex symbols, flirtatious, and deeply sensual. I had to work with them. Fast forward three years later and I graduated from my first Brown Girls Burlesque Broad Squad Institute. Check the ladies out here.

There they are my Sexy secret weapons! Want more? Enter your email here:

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An Update to Your Dreams

Daydreaming I Was Thinking of You......

Sooooo......

I've got this feeling that you've got a dream you are running from right now in this moment.

Who You?

Yes You,

What's your excuse for not going for it?

Not enough time?

Not enough money?

What if all those "not enough's" just melted away?

Here's the deal (and it is a deal)

Dara Cole (owner of Sacred Brooklyn) and I have dreamed up a party to help you strategize, brainstorm, and create a plan for making your dream a reality. 

This is a Pay-What-You-Desire-Or-Nothing-At-All Event.
Sacred Dream Team
 July 21 4-7 pm
197 Clifton Place
Brooklyn, NY 11216

Maybe your dream (like mine) is to take SacredBrooklyn's Teacher Training (this is a dream 14 years in the making for me!)

or

You've got a business idea that needs hatching.

Come use the spirit of community to make your dreams a reality and never let the "not enoughs" rule your life again.

xoxo

The #1 Secret to Saving More Money (It has nothing to do with percentages)

Earlier this month, I spent the week visiting family in Savannah and Atlanta.

I also managed to fit in Monica Shah’s Money 2.0 event.

What an amazing time.

I left Atlanta energized and just a little terrified by what I’ve got in the works for the next 12 months.

That’s why I love traveling.

I love the sense of anticipation that accompanies lift off

and the deep yearning to just be home when a trip is done.

Or even better,

that feeling that you get when you just aren’t ready to leave yet.

That keen sense of adventure

of breaking patterns

 and going somewhere new

In fact,

 Adventure is one of my core values.

My other core values are

Love, Family/Friends, Pleasure, Generosity, Health, and Wealth

I use my core values as a gauge for my spending.

When I log into Mint.com and check my spending habits for the month,

 I know which categories should be high because those tend to be the categories I value you the most.

It makes decisions around spending money so much easier and way more abundant.

I try never to have a conversation about what I can afford.

It’s more about do I value this item over this other thing.

I love clothes (like seriously I love clothes), I love the rush of shopping and getting something new, but I had to teach myself to recognize that mindless purchases are way less pleasurable then being able to pay for my yoga membership and my weekly massage.

That dress I almost bought on a whim could get me to Seattle and back.

 Do I want to go to my Soul City where I get to see my peoples, eat amazing food, and recharge in nature?

Or do I want to wear a dress that I’ll be excited about (if I’m lucky) for 2 wearings?

When you know what you value the answer is a no brainer.

So,

 Question

What do you value?

Below is a pdf with a list of possible values.

It is by no means exhaustive,  feel free to add your own.

Once you have your core values let them guide you in making your money decisions.

When you log into Mint.com

 (Your only excuse for not being on Mint.com should be that you prefer some other personal finance software)

Pay attention to how your spending is in alignment with your values.

Money is like a beautiful woman

She freaking loves attention.

So love her up.

xoxo,

Your Sexy Money Homework:

1.      Make a list of your Core Values

            Find the Values.pdf here

  Pick out the values that make you feel good. Try and narrow them down to 5 or 6.

2.       Start tracking your monthly spending (use mint.com.) Seriously if you aren’t doing this yet what are you waiting for?!

3.       When you make a purchase, ask yourself does this bring me closer to my values or further away?

For more Sexy Money Homework designed to take all my ladies from 0 to 60 in all matters money
Sign Up Here!

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Hey Baby, How's Your Money?

How IS your money?

Does that question make you cringe?

Is your money currently overdrawn?

Are you ashamed about the amount of debt you have?

Are you carrying the same amount of debt you had ten years ago?

Are you so stressed and bored with your job that you spend all day shopping online?

Do you wake up in the middle of the night anxious that there’s not enough?

Is there EVER enough?

Are you tired of working one low wage job after another?

Do you think that being an intuitive, artist or creative person means you will be broke forever?

Maybe you make plenty of money but have nothing to show for it?

 Whatever your money problem is right is this moment.

I’ve got a message for you

You ready?

Shhhh.

You don’t have to have all the answers

Let me repeat that

You don’t have to have all the answers

What you do need is:   Awareness

                                     Clarity

Your relationship to money and abundance is one of the most important relationships in your life.

There is a reason why money is one of the top causes of divorce.

How many of us know stories about friends and family who no longer talk to each other over money?

So, if money is one of your most important relationship partners, why not treat your money like you treat your lover, your child, your parent, your sibling, or your best friend?

When your child is acting up, sad, or sick,

You know it’s time for you to give him or her some extra attention.

Your money is the SAME way

Money likes attention.

Correction Money Adores attention.

Money is like a carnival princess dancing the samba in a gorgeous diamond encrusted costume

She wants to be seen.

 Here are 5 ways you can pay more attention to your money this week:

1.      Sign up for Mint.com. it’s great! It’s what I use, personally, and it’s owned by Intuit, a very reputable financial company known for products and services like Quicken, QuickBooks and TurboTax.

2.      Have a weekly Money Makeout. Start by keeping your receipts in your wallet along with a few index cards. Once a week (or more if you are a big spender :) set aside 5 minutes. Find a quiet place. Light some candles and incense. Pour a cup of your most decadent hot chocolate and list out on an index card everything you spent your money on this week. Use the receipts to help. I’ve done this for the last four years and it cured my shopping addiction.

3.      Tell her all the things she does right. Be grateful. Do you have a place to live? Your money did that. Food in your belly? Every morning find a way to list out 10 reasons you’re grateful.

4.      I’m Rich I’m Rich. My friend's niece is super adorable. She's a hoarder, but in a super, cute, ovary-twinge inducing kind of way.  Everything in her life makes her feel abundant. At her recent birthday party she was seen dancing around the room, birthday candles in hand yelling I'm rich I'm rich.  Give her a bunch of Band-Aids. Same reaction. She updates her own baby book. This girl knows how to savor. That idea that everything about you is precious and worthy of being kept in the annals and archives of the history that is your life. So try it. Pretend like you just won the lottery. Right now stop everything you’re doing (seriously it’s like a magic spell you gotta say it out loud) and yell at the top of your lungs!!! “Thank you for everything I have. I’m Rich I’m Rich I’m Rich!”

5.      Know your Money Archetype. Sometimes problems in a relationship are more about your communication style. Your money is saying one thing and you’re hearing something else. Go here to figure out your money style. There is an easy quiz to fill out and great tips on how to manage your money style. In four years by doing all the above steps I went from being a pleasure seeker (spending more than I made on trips, clothes, eating out etc) to a guardian (I get adorably anxious when my account falls below a certain number and my number grows each year).

 Try these 5 tips and I promise you will see some abundant shifts in your life around money.

If you wanna take your money ever higher enlist other women to do these things with you.

 A good place to start would be the Qoya workshop at Sacred Brooklyn Saturday April 7^th from 4pm -8pm. 

http://www.sacredbrooklyn.com/workshops/

Our theme? Abundance and Sexy Money.

I promise sexy movement, joy, ease, and abundance around money during this workshop. 

Isn’t it about time money was sexy?

 Xoxo

P.S There is a secret surprise for the woman who brings proof that she completed the steps listed above!

 For More Tips Sign Up here!

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